I’ve seen photos of people who are in the hospital with visible injuries from emotional trauma like from a road accident, a house fire, or a mental breakdown. Some people go through that, some don’t. I don’t know what it takes for me to feel the way I do right now. When I see the damage done in the pictures, sometimes I get so upset that I can’t see how to fix it or even how to even process it for myself.
So what happened? We all have a lot of emotional bruises from things that happen to us that make us feel like we can’t trust ourselves. We can’t trust our own feelings, our own emotions, our own rationality, our own ability to handle stress. The only thing that can help us get through those things is to get help from others who can help us figure out what ails us.
I think that the emotional bruises are a part of the spectrum in which we all fall. They’re a manifestation of our self-awareness, our self-awareness is like a mirror that shows us our core emotions and our core weaknesses. The problem is that this self-awareness is often not strong enough to understand what’s going on deep down, we often struggle with it and that can lead to some of the worst moments in our lives.
Most of our emotional bruises are caused by the things that we don’t even know we’re doing, like drinking or smoking. As a result, these emotional bruises can be very hard to deal with, and in the early stages of recovery they can make us feel a sense of deja vu.
In all seriousness, we have a ton of emotional bruises because we do a lot of things without even realizing it. It’s like when you wake up in the morning and it’s too early for your alarm, or when you realize that you’re not going to work on your computer for the day because you got a sick child to care for. The emotional bruises are the same thing, something that is completely out of our control and it can make us feel a sense of deja vu.
This is why it can be hard to get people to talk to us. Most people who talk to us online will have a ton of emotional bruises but even when they can talk, they forget to mention anything about their past or present situations. This can make us feel as if we’ve had a bad dream or two, or it can just make us feel stupid.
People who talk to us online tend to start off with a lot of emotional bruises and then fade right before our eyes. But, with a little bit of effort, we can even make them remember some details of their past and start telling us what happened before we went into a deep dive. But it takes practice, so don’t be discouraged. Ive learned a lot from the people Ive helped since starting this blog.
I think that’s the hardest part of this whole process. Once we’re able to make an effort, we’re able to start seeing our past as it really is, and it’s scary. But, this is a process for a reason. I want you to try to remember your past as it really is, not as you think it is. If you can remember your past as it really is, that will help keep you on track.
So the first step is to get yourself out of a toxic relationship (or three). You don’t need to do this in an instant, but it is an important step. You can be in a toxic relationship for years and never realize it. I know this is a scary thought for you, but I can tell you from experience that it can also be incredibly rewarding.
You cant get the toxic person off your back, you just need to know how to identify the toxic person. I know this is hard for you, and you may feel a bit overwhelmed by all of this, but do not let the idea of “what to do” overwhelm you. It’s just a thought, and you can use it to your advantage. Just remember, if this toxic person is toxic to you, you’re going to be toxic to them.